If feminism is broken, don't blame feminists

By Madeleine Whybrow

In a recent article for this blog, Ross Parry offered his views on the flaws of feminism. He argued that things such as the disproportionate amount of attention given to radical feminists and that even the outdated and divisive connotations of the word ‘feminism’ are holding the movement back. On both these points, I cannot agree more.

However, I have to take issue with one of his arguments, the suggestion that feminism is failing to educate enough people, especially men, and that feminists should be less “emotional and ignorant” when people question their views. In an ideal world, feminists would, of course, spend their time engaging in calm, constructive discussions and educating people about sexism and ways to fight it. However, our world is flawed, and any issues with feminism simply reflect that. 

For a start, it is important to remember that more often than not, those fighting sexism are those who are victims of it. The same people who are blogging and protesting are the same people whose lives are affected by discrimination and sometimes they don’t have the time, or the energy, to deal with both. It is not the responsibility of women to educate men about feminism and to ask that they do is unreasonable and unhelpful.

It’s also because of this that, yes, feminists do sometimes get emotional and, yes, we sometimes don’t respond to comments. Even today, even in the UK, women are faced with discrimination all the time. We are jeered at in the street, we are paid less than men for the same work and we are scared of being raped if we go out at night. Is it any wonder that if someone questions our experience of sexism we sometimes lose our cool?

What’s more, why is this singled out as a problem with feminism? Any subject can evoke emotion, on either side of the argument. Whether they’re discussing feminism, the civil rights movement or if cats are better than dogs; people get upset and they get angry. It’s neither right nor effective but everyone does it – it’s a problem with people, not with feminists.

Despite this, most feminists do, in my experience, engage in calm, thoughtful discussion, providing the same is offered in return. Particularly as so much of the discussion is now had on the internet, a huge amount of the ‘debate’ comes from people who are simply there to make trouble. They do not want to be educated and to try to do so is a waste of time and effort.

What’s more, a very small amount of traffic to feminist pages falls into the category that Ross found himself in: interested but undecided. The internet is a very poor tool for converting people simply because most of those genuinely looking for feminist pages are likely to be at least sympathetic to the cause. Many authors choose to aim their material at this (usually female) demographic simply because they know their words are more likely to reach an appreciative audience.

However this modern, online, feminism does play a role in reaching new people, it is just a more subtle and indirect role than first appears. It is a very effective tool not for finding new feminists but for bringing existing feminists together. It is equipping us with new ideas and methods of discussion. Crucially, it gives us the confidence to take our discussions away from the internet and into the “real world” where we can influence those who would otherwise be hostile. It is here, talking to friends and relatives about what we read on the internet, where the real difference will made.

Male feminists have a huge part to play in this. They do not experience the same problems as women and cannot understand what we go through, but this can be a strength not a hindrance. It means they can fight battles and educate others on women’s behalf when we are too worn down to do it ourselves. It is true, some women would rather we had ‘male allies’ than ‘male feminists’ but the label shouldn’t matter: feminists are defined by what they do, rather than what they call themselves.

So, yes, feminism is flawed. It could be doing more to spread its message and to engage new recruits but there is only so much progress we can make. The sexism which drives the need for feminism is the same thing stopping it reaching its full potential. However, that is not to say that all hope is lost. Feminism today cannot change the world in one big sweep but it can support individual feminists as change their small bit of it. Our best advocates and educators are not the faceless feminists of the internet but the real men and women taking the arguments and discussions to a truly wide audience.

 Join the debate on twitter at: https://twitter.com/MissMadeleine1

AND https://twitter.com/RossMParry