Single at Christmas

 By Jo Paterson

So it’s Christmas; schools have broken up for the holidays, town centres are crammed full with shoppers and festooned with lights, Christmas songs dominate radio playlists and you can’t watch anything on tv without being reminded of what the season is supposed to be about (ie. food, presents, family, love and celebrating the perfectness of life)... This isn’t a scroogey Christmas blog where I’m about to say how much I hate all these things because actually, I love them. I love Christmas. 

But what gets me is that according to the world, I’m supposed to be coupled up, receiving something expensive from my gorgeous loving boyfriend, spending Saturdays hand in hand with him in town and cold winter nights cuddling up with him on the sofa. What is it about Christmas that fills us with dread at the prospect of being alone? Christmas is all about being together, the media tell us, and I know that that is about family and friends and community. But we’re also pummelled with the idea that our Christmas isn’t perfect without an adoring other half to complete us. 

Sex Sells...But It Doesn't Have To.

By Megan O'Kane 

This year there has been a media frenzy surrounding sexism in the music industry. There was the “Blurred Lines” fiasco - where Robin Thicke’s summer smash hit was branded “sexist,” “misogynistic” and subsequently banned in nightclubs and universities across the country. The song then went on to hold the top spot on the Billboard Hot 100 for 12 weeks, selling more than 6 million tracks. Then there was Miley-Gate, and we all know what happened there! Miss Cyrus’ latest album “Bangerz” has sold an impressive 270,000 units in its first week.

I dream of self-esteem

By Nicki Fudge

Shall we be honest with ourselves for a second? We have ALL struggled from low self esteem about the way that we look. Some of us hide it behind layers of makeup, extensive wardrobes and multiple hair products. Others take the opposite route, and develop a spiky attitude that screams ‘I REALLY don’t care what you think of my appearance’, whilst hiding their body and their face behind baggy clothes and deliberate lack of effort.

So here are three ways in which I tackled my own total hatred of my physical appearance which, although it hasn't completely gone away (I still get a few days every month where I can’t stand how I look),  has now changed from something that regularly used to dominate my thoughts, to feeling laughably irrelevant to my general life.

Make love not war.

By Hannah O'Donnell

It is difficult to judge equality in a relationship from a singleton’s point view. As a singleton it is all for one and one for me and I don’t have to consult anyone else on my behaviour or my choices. I have found, however, that this isn’t the case in a relationship.

It is not for lack of freedom, but for the sake of compromise you understand.

I’m dressing as a sexy devil for Halloween and the patriarchy has nothing to do with it

By Elly Murrell

George Berry has already done a fantastic response to Flo’sarticle which you should read here. The kind with metaphors I can only dream to conjure up. With the male side of the argument covered I’d like to throw in my two cents.

Why girls shouldn't dress in sexy costumes for Halloween: an exercise in positive discrimination.

By George Berry

So you’ve read Flo’s article about the trend of women dressing revealingly for Halloween, and why doing so is putting back their gender a century, and if you haven’t then stop reading here and follow this link to do so here.

I feel like the word “patriarchy” is used to basically whitewash a subject with a buzzword. It’s true that men expect certain things of women that we probably shouldn’t, such as being in good shape with an obvious care to your hygiene and physical appearance, but isn’t that exactly what you’d expect in a man (or mate of the same gender)? A lot of issues can be put both ways, the status quo not only perpetuates the trend of racy costumes but also puts pressure on men in similar ways.

Happy Halloween

By Florence Celia May

From Flo's World

So I've spoken about fancy dress on here before, but it's Halloween time again, and I just want to get all this angst I have off my chest.

Why barbie is a feminist

By Megan O'Kane

In May 2013, Europe’s first life-sized Barbie Dreamhouse opened its doors in Berlin. The opening of this pink paradise was overshadowed in the media by a feminist protest, involving a topless woman and a burning cross.

Michael Koschitzki, a member of the Occupy Barbie Dreamhouse protest group argues that "… this so-called Dreamhouse symbolizes the beauty craze and the discrimination of women in modern-day life. It presents a cliché of the female role in society." I very much disagree with this viewpoint. I believe that Barbie and her empire, which has grown steadily over 50 years, are an example of feminism at its best.

Why catcalling is not a compliment

By Joy McManus

Catcalling is defined by Urban Dictionary, a relevant source in this case, as:

‘When a guy gives the wert whirl whistle or yells at a babydoll for the purpose of getting attention and in hopes of a future hook up… 99.9% [of the time] a hookup never arises and it’s just the thrill that keeps these going’

Sometimes if a girl gets catcalled and then communicates that she didn’t appreciate it the response can often be ‘take it as a compliment’, which I don’t understand. How is it meant to be a compliment if a passing stranger thinks they have the right to comment on your body or how much they’d like to have sex with you? The fact that we need to justify why catcalling is wrong saddens me- surely not being shouted at and harassed as we go about our daily lives should be a human right.

Miley vs Sinead: a Dutiful perspective

A row between two major pop egos has got two of our writers talking:

Mean girls: the culture of bitching

By Nicki Fudge

“Nobody ever talks about the mean things that girls do to each other”

Bitchiness is endemic but, as this quote (from the author of the book that the film ‘Mean Girls’ is based upon) states, it is rarely spoken about. ‘Mean Girls’ is a hilarious film, and one of its main attractions for me is its highly accurate depiction of the way some women behave towards each other: the culture of bitching.

If feminism is broken, don't blame feminists

By Madeleine Whybrow

In a recent article for this blog, Ross Parry offered his views on the flaws of feminism. He argued that things such as the disproportionate amount of attention given to radical feminists and that even the outdated and divisive connotations of the word ‘feminism’ are holding the movement back. On both these points, I cannot agree more.

However, I have to take issue with one of his arguments, the suggestion that feminism is failing to educate enough people, especially men, and that feminists should be less “emotional and ignorant” when people question their views. In an ideal world, feminists would, of course, spend their time engaging in calm, constructive discussions and educating people about sexism and ways to fight it. However, our world is flawed, and any issues with feminism simply reflect that. 

Stop being so sentimental – feminism needs a reboot

By Ross Parry

I’m sure that, if you’re reading this blog, you have come into contact many times with the argument that feminism is a female-superiority movement. I am equally confident that at least half of you lovely readers know that this is rubbish.

Feminism is a movement which believes that gender inequality is an issue in much of the world and that this takes the form of women having fewer rights than men (in most instances, anyway). So where does the image of feminism as a tribal, man-hating world domination group come from?

Is the internet good for feminism?

More and more women are engaging with feminism because of the internet; some even believe that we are witnessing the movement’s fourth wave. The online community provides us platforms from which to voice our opinions and safe places to host our discussions. However, it has also brought us LadBible, Twitter trolls and objectification far worse than the content of lad’s mags. The same things helping feminism to flourish are being used to equal effect by those intent on destroying it. So, do the benefits outweigh the negatives? Or is the internet harming the fight for women’s rights? Three of our writers air their views.

Warning: Article contains some explicit content.

The Glasses Ceiling

By Bethan Gormley

There is a distinct lack of famous women in the music industry who openly and actively wear glasses, which is an issue that I have been noticing for a few years now. The music industry is one of the few sectors in which female presence almost equals its male counterpart; the glass-ceiling has been smashed, it would seem. But the glasses-ceiling? Not so smashed.

A Close Shave

Hazel discussing the issue of body hair. We’d love comments and discussion on this!

Hazel : 

http:/www.twitter.com/Hazeltron

http://www.youtube.com/Hazeltron

The Dutiful: http://www.twitter.com/TheDutiful 

Single Pringle

By Nicki Fudge

This year I began to do the one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I stopped actively looking for a relationship, and started to turn down anyone who asked. I deliberately chose to be single.

In defence of Lara Croft

By James Southworth

The debate to which this post refers has come back into gaming circles recently due to the release of the Tomb Raider reboot, in which well-loved archaeologist cum pistol marksman Lara Croft has undergone a few fundamental changes. Gone are the bare legs with gun holders designed to look like suspender tops, the shining perfect skin (even when crawling through Egyptian ruins and muddy swamps) and, probably the most significant change, a reduction in breast size to something less evocative of two swollen basketballs. In steps a young woman wearing cargo pants, a generic vest top and covered in bloody grazes and dirt. It seems like a change for the better, no?

Miley, you can (and should) stop.

By Coralie Clover

I will defend Miley Cyrus' right to wear whatever she likes until the end of my days. The two piece costume she donned on Sunday was essentially no different to the beige set Lady Gaga wore in a great deal of the video to Alejandro (or, in fact, the underwear Gaga ended up in at the VMAs at the end of her performance), and I don't think simply vilifying her for that is useful or constructive; a topic which this blog covered very nicely a few days ago. The entire performance was problematic in so many different ways that simply plucking out her clothes and designating them the root of all evil – but only commenting on that, too, without considering the wider issues – is a bit reductive.

She's just being Miley

Two of our authors talk about our reactions to THAT performance:

Primary School Teachers: The Great Divide

By Mia Chapman

Before I begin, I would like to explain why this post may not come across as particularly feminist. Until recently, I would not have used this word to describe myself because for me, like many others, this label came with negative connotations of the extreme. I have now come to realise that I do, in fact, agree with the cause: equal opportunities and free choice. I am in no way a man hater, which is what I once believed you had to be, and that is why I am writing this post; because I believe in equal opportunities and freedom for men as well as women.

Think back to your primary school days and try to remember how many of your teachers were male and how many female, particularly in the early years. I believe I had two throughout my entire seven years, and these were in years five and six. I am about to go to study to become a primary school teacher at University, which is a particularly female dominated profession; further indication that there is still a huge amount of gender division within the workplace.  I have not yet started my degree and do not know exactly how many men are on the course but, from my experiences at interviews and talking to future coursemates via Facebook, it is clear that the men will be significantly outnumbered. The numbers of male primary school teachers are increasing, albeit incredibly slowly, and, from the most recent 2011 -2012 statistics, a mere 19% of trainee registrations were in fact male [Source: The Department for Education, 2012].

Male and female brains

By Madeleine Whybrow 

The idea that men and women are inherently different, particularly in psychological terms, is a popular, perhaps even obvious, view. Common sense tells us that behaviour depends heavily on gender; men are often more aggressive and prone to risk-taking, whereas women tend to be kinder and more communicative. Could it be that these differences are hard-wired into our brains?

If you don't like me, you can just jog on.

Dating is a minefield, right?

I am a child of Cosmopolitan, Glamour and Company, and because of this I have been operating under ridiculous dating rules, trying to present myself as someone entirely different, in the vain hope that my date will think me worthy of seeing again. Here are four of the main things I have been repeatedly guilty of:

First World Feminism

This year I took part in a feminism campaign organised by my university’s student union’s women’s campaign, in which pictures were taken of students holding a whiteboard with the message “I need feminism because...”. On my whiteboard I wrote the message “I need feminism because Private Eye, the Economist, NME, New Scientist, etc. shouldn’t be categorised under ‘men’s interests’”. Though mainly positive, the picture did elicit some negative feedback, perhaps most annoyingly a comment that read “Nice to see you all keeping the major issues in the spotlight...”.

Where are all the women scientists?

By Madeleine Whybrow

The workplace has seen significant progress in terms of gender equality in modern times and is a reasonable success story for the feminist movement. In Britain today women enjoy more employment rights than in any other point in history. We have better pay and more opportunities than any of our predecessors, and are less likely to be discriminated against. However, it is clear that some areas are progressing faster than others.

Girls who eat their feelings.

No one likes to be dumped. And this goes for all forms of rejection, whether by a man, job interview or friend.

 Rejection makes us feel unwanted, unattractive, unhappy. The list goes on…

 So we reach for that tub of the ice cream. We eat our feelings. We compare ourselves to Bridget Jones with that tub of Ben & Jerry’s. One last feast, and then tomorrow, we’ll turn our lives around, we’ll show them.

 This is a disastrous coping mechanism.

#shoutingback

 ‘Feminism’ used to be a bold, italicised, negative word to me. I saw it as connected to narrow minded women who refuse and discourage genuine chivalry. Those who in the process of fighting for women’s rights are treading on the voices and rights of decent men. And I would to this day still hold to that. The end goal is equal rights, but recently I’ve realised that to create a balance there needs to be a push towards working on the female side of that.

The Thigh Gap

The glorification of diet fads such as the Dukan, “No Carbs before Marbs” and Samantha Brick’s latest contribution to the world of journalism, the “polo diet”, has convinced women of all ages and sizes that life just isn’t worth living if the gap between your thighs is less than three inches.  British women these days are 5’6 on average and weigh in around 10st 3lbs, giving them a BMI of 23 and placing them in the upper-half of the ‘healthy’ scale.  Sure, you could lose 6 BMI points and still hover around the healthy mark, but why can’t we be happy in our own skin?

Feminists Shave Their Legs Too

Recently I've been thinking a lot about where I fit into society, what is my identity? Ticked boxes on a questionnaire might describe me as "white British", "18-25", "female", "graduate", "single", "employed", "Christian". All labels, and none that make me unique, but that mean I belong to a certain category of the population. The last year of emerging from the student bubble into the world of work has made me think more about my role in society, and especially as a young woman. What does it mean to be a 20 something girl in Britain right now?